Email Forwarding Appreciated

I got this email forwarded to me from my uncle who got it from somebody else that got it from another person that had received it....

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Subject: Thanks for all of the FORWARDS this year!!

As another year will shortly be a memory, my heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.

Extra thanks for the ones that I have to open 15 times to get to the message.

Special thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat dung and roach eggs in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.

Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. Because of your concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola, because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi, or Dr Pepper, since the people who make these products are atheists who won't put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave, because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants, even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls, because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from, nor send packages by UPS, or FedEx, since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer answer the phone, because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC, because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.

I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus, since I now have their recipe.



I no longer worry about my soul, because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

I no longer have any savings, because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor!

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM (EDT) this afternoon.
I know this will occur, because it actually did happen to a friend of mine's next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.

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Man Denied Equal Rights!

Some one has to tell the political correct crowd that enough is enough. Exporting their nonsense to our British allies is a bit too much.
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OK, here is the story. Some (unnamed) man in Great Britain has filed a complaint because a GP would not test him for cervical cancer. The man claims to be a hermaphrodite but doctors have found no evidence that this is true. Without a cervix it is a tad difficult to perform a pap smear test. They are dealing with a nut! (They should release this guy's name in the interest of public safety)

So what happens? - quote from Telegraph News - The complaint has caused doctors in the west country practice to spend hours in meetings and writing replies to the local primary care trust over the complaint which began two years ago - AND - "The refusal of one of the doctors to put Mr X on the recall list for cervical screening has resulted in a complaint and, as a result the doctor, practice manager and other practitioners have spent many hours, at the expense of the care of other patients, answering written inquiries.
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He (Tim Terry, consultant in reconstructive urology, Leicester University Hospitals NHS Trust) said: "There are some people with ambiguous genitalia but I have not come across a man who was normal physically and fertile who was in this inter-sex group. My advice would be to refer the patient to a sexual dysfunction clinic."

A local primary care trust spokesman said: "We have received a complaint as you described and as required, under the NHS complaints procedure, we are investigating along with other complaints from the individual." - end http://www.portal.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2003/01/16/nsmear16.xml quotes -

prying1 sez: What's the big deal? He wants a pap smear. Tie the man down and smear him all over with pap! Then slap a strait jacket on him. After that, fire the employees at the local primary care trust. - Scheesh! Who is nuttier? This obvious mental case or the idiots working in the local primary care trust.

Hat tip to Blue Star Chronicles - Who hat tips Mark in Mexico

The End of the Story!

My attempt at writing a short story:

He was hiding behind the rock. It was a big rock and it shielded him from the bullets flying his way. He felt safe for the moment but little did he realize that one of his assassins had circled around and above him. He didn't even hear the gunshot.

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All I need is a beginning and a middle (with some love interest - plus a dog, guitar, mom and a train) and I think I have a million book seller. Anyone want to help me out here?

No WMD's?

I was going to post a bit on how tired I am of the No WMD's complaint from the left. I pulled up a few references through Google and got tired of reading the evidence that a lot of crap has been found. I got tired of seeing evidence that Iraq had several programs to build weapons that would destroy indiscriminately. I got tired of the evidence that Saddam gassed the Kurds.

That the left continually claims to support the troops and then claim that these same troops are only fighting because 'Bush lied', and it is all because of the oil makes me tired. I get tired when evidence is thrown into their faces and they continually whine about "Poor Saddam" having his country taken from him (They don't actually say it but I must assume that if they just wanted the U.N. to pile on more sanctions instead of taking him out through force they must prefer he remained in power.)

As I said I'm tired of it.

BUT! Not too tired to give up and let them take over the blogosphere.

Analyzing both sides of the issue I say Bush did the right thing. Iraq will be a shining example of democracy in the Middle East. This will be the Republican President Bush's legacy. In spite of the naysayers!

Virus Laden Junk Email Starting on the 6th of January?

Wouldn't it be wonderful if they gave a virus attack and nobody bit into it?

The date is drawing near for what might be the next Sober virus attack. Please use caution in opening any emails even if they appear to be from friends.

Some 'Quick Quotes' from Cnet.com's article linked below:

...thanks to another set of researchers at iDefense (link on original page not operative), we think January 5 or 6, 2006, either a Thursday or a Friday--just in time to fill everyone's e-mailbox with junk over the weekend--is the most likely of those dates for that attack to occur. -

Imagine sending a very large and sophisticated virus over e-mail--your ISP or company would certainly stop it dead at the gateway. So, virus writers have started sending out smaller versions that merely infect. Once installed, the small virus then opens a backdoor to call out to the predetermined Web server IP address from which it then loads a more sophisticated version of itself (or it transforms the infected PC into a conduit for spam, pornography, or a host of other malicious uses). -

Most of the Sober variants use a trigger delay; they install quickly but then sleep for a preset period of time before reaching out and contacting the Internet for a new download.

**** Most important lines in the article ****

Prevention
It's important to note that your PC must already be infected with Sober before it becomes a foot soldier in this expected January 5 assault. No infection, no participation. So clean your desktop computer now. For corporate systems, it's also important to create firewall rules that block IP requests to the January 5 addresses. According to F-Secure, the addresses to be contacted on January 5, 2006, include:...
AND ~ AND ~ AND !!!
Unfortunately, many PCs worldwide are connected to the Internet without antivirus protection. I expect to see some activity but not a full-out assault. Either way, keep your antivirus protection primed over the holidays and install a firewall if you haven't already. And don't be too surprised if you find a ton of junk e-mail in your in-box starting January 6, 2006, or you find your e-mail traffic is a little slower. It's Sober.

Hat tip to Papergirl8 - Check out her ebay auctions!

Happy Birthday Louis Braille

I have to admit I really admire some of the folks at Google. At least the ones that come up with the cartoons for their logo. This one dated January 4th 2006:

has a little banner that pops up when you run the mouse across it that says, "Happy Birthday Louis Braille!"
Great imaginations down there at Google will keep it on top for quite a while.

The story of Louis Braille can be found here and is quite an interesting read. Did you know he became blind from a childhood accident with an awl? Later it was with an awl that he perfected the Braille alphabet. I learned something new today.

Amy Proctor Shares a Wonderful Video/Slideshow

This one is a must see. Hope that you have a fast connection because it is 29mbs...

Amy Proctor put together a slide show and called it a New Years Video Salute to Our Troops ~~~~~~~~ Must see and pass this link on. Really wonderfully done. Thanks Amy!!!

P.S. The file is an executable but not to worry. Checks out fine on PC (Don't know about Mac) and starts as soon as you open it. No special programs needed to see it.

hat tip to AubreyJ at AubreyJ.org.

I DID IT!

The most dangerous job if the season is finished. That is, dragging the Christmas tree outside without spilling the water all over.

In times past I've taken old towels and soaked the water out of the tree holder and then watched in dismay as the rags drip a line of water to the kitchen sink. I've crawled under the tree and used a cup to transfer the water to a pot and then spilt the pot as I got tangled in the tree. Plus I couldn't get quite all the water out and spilled some more moving the tree.

This year I said, "To heck with it." Grabbed the tree by the trunk and carried it straight up. Forced it through two doorways and into the back yard. No water on the carpet and only a few drops by the back door. A swiffer took care of that real quick.

They should give out prizes or something for a job well done.

Hey! I have an idea for next year. I'll trim all the branches off and leave the trunk for a coat rack.